Fresh and Funny Tweets We Stole From the Bird App (September 20, 2022)

Good tidings, internet friends. We've just got finished with another day on the world wide web, and let us tell you, things haven't gotten any better. While some people on Twitter are freaking out about that Adam Levine cheating drama, others are still talking about the arguably timely demise of Queen Elizabeth II. Meanwhile, we're over here like "Can we please get some viral tweets over here that aren't something like 'when I love, I love HARD?'". Sadly it's true, the internet can be a completely unfunny cacophony of unwanted opinions. But thanks to funny people, and people like us who collect tweets, it is possible to have a laugh courtesy of the bird app. We're here to help you enjoy those unicorns without actually logging on to the damn site. 

Author image for Ada Elder Ada Elder
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  • 01
    Outerwear - Wall Street Silver @Wall Street Silv First day without his mom, look at the buttons on his suit jacket 7:12 PM 9/17/22 Twitter Web App ... 1,950 Retweets 180 Quote Tweets 17.3K Likes
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  • 02
    Font - fentanyl @deadsbirth "can i have your number?" bro i told you i got a bf like 530-294-2740 times 1:36 PM 9/18/22 Twitter for iPhone 1,882 Retweets 186 Quote Tweets 27.1K Likes
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  • 03
    Nose - finally 11:36 yes robin nice to meet you @sherwood_fores_ Scientists create the first ever autistic monkeys 28 January 2016 NATURE .LTE These are the first monkeys ever to have autism. 10:33 AM - 9/17/22 Twitter for iPhone . 366 Retweets 115 Quote Tweets 6,191 Likes ...
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  • 04
    Font - Rob C @iarentspartacus It'll be a difficult wank admittedly.... M @ hannels sky de HD,W The Funeral Of Queen Elizabeth II otting and Dermot Murnaghan present live coverage of the State of Her Majesty The Queen from Westminster Abbey and Windsor with commentary from Alastair Bruce. HD +1 Monday 11.00am 900 Television X 01 Adult Channel 902 Xpanded TV 903 babes&brazzers 906 Babenation 908 Get Lucky TV 910 XXXpublicpikups 915 TVX 40+ Docs 56% 14:03 Catch Up TV ess SELECT to set reminder or Ⓡ
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  • 05
    Font - Kristen Mulrooney @missmulrooney The #1 cause of death in New Englanders is overheating while apple picking in brown boots and a flannel shirt when it's 85° in September. 1:43 PM 9/17/22 Twitter for iPhone 203 Retweets 19 Quote Tweets 4,083 Likes
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  • 06
    Font - Daisy Alioto @daisandconfused microdosing wikipedia (marrying a man with ADHD) 2:59 PM 9/17/22 Twitter Web App . 5,554 Retweets 854 Quote Tweets 76.7K Likes ...
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  • 07
    Cat - haley @feederofcats don't be fooled by how cute this picture is. he is charging up his violence via photosynthesis
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  • 08
    Font - Cait @CaitCamelia Similar to the children in Lemony Snicket's 1999 novel, I have also been experiencing a series of unfortunate events 9:19 PM - 9/16/22 Twitter for iPhone 15.4K Retweets 288 Quote Tweets 81.5K Likes
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  • 09
    Organism - Jack Corbett @jackcorrbit termites are like: don't talk to me before i've had my coffee table 6:33 PM 9/17/22 Twitter for iPhone . 4,699 Retweets 64 Quote Tweets 66.8K Likes
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  • 10
    Font - indie @INDIEWASHERE my favourite Twitter moment so far is when that elephant killed that old woman and everyone just sided with elephant w no hesitation or even knowing the back story 7:19 PM 9/17/22 Twitter for iPhone 5,507 Retweets 238 Quote Tweets 69.9K Likes
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  • 11
    Font - unintentionelle @ellewasamistake judge: do you swear to speak the truth and nothing but the truth me: yes judge: who do you like me: omg dare 10:29 AM - 9/17/22 Twitter Web App 25.3K Retweets 592 Quote Tweets 252K Likes
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  • 12
    Font - Tig Notaro @TigNotaro One time my gynecologist was like "you need to pee" and I was like "no I'm good" and he was like “I have a camera inside you and I can see that you need to pee" and it turns out he was right so that definitely feels like a step backwards for feminism 7:28 PM 9/16/22 from Los Angeles, CA Twitter for iPhone . . 3,341 Retweets 224 Quote Tweets 104K Likes
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  • 13
    Eyebrow - matt @mattxiv it's been one year since the best news ever Catholic Bishop resigns after falling in love with Satanic-erotica author Edna Agnes Boakye 1 year Ago 5:06 PM 9/16/22 Twitter for iPhone . 20.2K Retweets 3,677 Quote Tweets 245K Likes
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  • 14
    Font - askeladd @BozoPack econ students be like damn i got a graph of why people need to starve due at 11:59 3:33 PM - 9/16/22 Twitter for iPhone 1,390 Retweets 73 Quote Tweets 15.7K Likes
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  • 15
    Font - Jesse Case @jessecase As you age, it's ridiculous how fast bird-watching creeps up on you. You spend your whole life being 100% indifferent to birds, and then one day you're like "damn is that a yellow- rumped warbler" 2:27 PM 9/17/22 Twitter Web App . 3,574 Retweets 760 Quote Tweets 39.3K Likes
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  • 16
    Font - john @mrjohndarby watching an old person struggling with a jar and saying "allow me" and tightening it even more 9:56 AM 9/17/22 Twitter for Android . 3,358 Retweets 94 Quote Tweets 44.5K Likes
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  • 17
    Font - Douglas A. Boneparth @dougboneparth Just got the new iPhone 14 Pro Max and I've never been more excited to pay $1,099 for the same exact user experience as my last iPhone. 10:10 AM 9/17/22 Twitter for iPhone . 97 Retweets 10 Quote Tweets 1,789 Likes
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  • 18
    Font - Matthew Elliot @matttbastard gm check out the real five stages of development V Early life Controversial thoughts on the Antichrist ✓ Schizophrenia diagnosis ✓ Meme page adimin ✓ CIA assassination 10:32 AM 9/16/22 Twitter for Android 2,539 Retweets 189 Quote Tweets 30.3K Likes
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  • 19
    Organism - Matt Nedostup @nedostup OK but good luck getting him out of there NEW YORK POST New York Post @nypost 55m 'Phantom of the Opera' will close on Broadway trib.al/gnN81pp 2 123 54 2:18 PM 9/16/22 Twitter Web App 3,463 Retweets 76 Quote Tweets 35.9K Likes
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  • 20
    Font - cullen 'swamp trash' crawford @HelloCullen i wonder if sleeping 4 hours a night and never drinking water from 9th grade to like 2 years after leaving college had some kinda long term effect on me 2:11 PM 9/16/22 Twitter Web App . 778 Retweets 36 Quote Tweets 16.7K Likes
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  • 21
    Font - McKenzie Goodwin @McKGoodwin ATTENTION Male screenwriters!!! | know it seems cute and quirky but women don't use lipstick to write messages. It's expensive. No woman is wasting $30 to write her number on a napkin for a guy. 4:31 PM 9/16/22 Twitter for iPhone . 8,819 Retweets 833 Quote Tweets 118K Likes
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  • 22
    Sleeve - abbie @ufoparts trisha paytas i have your baby NOT RECOMMENDED FOR CHILONEN UNDER The Sun Set malibu Barbie MATTEL Twist in Turn waist. Bendable legs. Poseable. No. 1067
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  • 23
    Font - working on my tight 5 @delamomanny Me, finally having a child in 2046: "go outside and play with your cousin" My child: "but he's 34..." 8:03 PM - 9/15/22 Twitter Web App 16.7K Retweets 2,175 Quote Tweets 104K Likes
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  • 24
    Font - xXblueXx @noctblues people saying Trishas kid is gonna be bullied for her name, trust if my name was malibu barbie i would be the one doing the bullying 10:18 PM - 9/15/22 Twitter for Android 8,742 Retweets 326 Quote Tweets 111K Likes
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  • 25
    Font - Foekoe Gaming @Foekoe Care to explain Epic Games??? ICON SERIES | QUEEN ELIZABETH Show your style. Friends. Allies. Found family. A new icon for your banner. Introduced in Chapter 3, Season 3. 12:11 PM 9/15/22 Twitter Web App 7,582 Retweets 417 Quote Tweets 128K Likes
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  • 26
    Font - pj @pjayevans Can I come over. I got the zoomies and you have an open floor plan 10:14 AM - 9/16/22 Twitter for iPhone 15.9K Retweets 441 Quote Tweets 157K Likes
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  • 27
    Hair - HOOD VOGUE is tired of pove... . 1d now why King Triton got a daughter from every sea??? sarah* is HEATED. | TLM DA.... 3d there are two (2) white mermaids in the live action little mermaid for #them to attach themselves to. A Show this thread 554 8,462 135K HOOD VOGUE is tired of poverty @keyon The Nick cannon of the ocean.... ...
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  • 28
    Font - Kristen Mulrooney @missmulrooney One of the perks of marriage is having someone around to let you know which normal things from your childhood were actually very very weird 9:35 AM 9/15/22 Twitter for iPhone . ... 4,128 Retweets 488 Quote Tweets 70.3K Likes
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  • 29
    Font - Jus @1Myles4 Put them kids back on zoom this traffic Is ridiculous 9:45 AM 9/15/22 Twitter for iPhone . 61.2K Retweets 3,855 Quote Tweets 339K Likes
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humor twitter Queen Elizabeth II england relatable funny memes dank memes relatable tweets funny tweets funny
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